What is it to live as a girl in Delhi?

It scares me. The thought of it reminds me of the 16th December incident. The Nirbhaya story has left an indelible scar in the life of every Indian woman.

I have visited Delhi once. It was years ago when I was in the 3rd grade. I had toured around Delhi with my parents. The lotus temple is all I remember today. It was meant to be one of the most peaceful places in Delhi. I had found Delhi inviting as a kid. But today, alas it is not the same.

Recently, my husband had been receiving a lot of job offers from companies that were situated in Delhi. Every time he considered a decent option and came to me for an opinion, he would be offensively denied with a single word, "NO". What followed was another sentence, "Don't you know it's dreadful for a woman to live there?"

And then, it gets me to thinking how do woman survive in Delhi? Recently, one of my colleagues and I were having an argument about working in Delhi. As always I was dreadfully against it. He was however trying his best to convince me. He said that Delhi was a very well-planned city. It had huge roads, the metro is the best in Delhi and house rent is not as exorbitant like Mumbai. But there was one assurance that he as a Delhite couldn't give, "Safety for woman".

I watched an advertisement this morning where the great Arnab Goswami was heard asking questions to the ministers on who is to be blamed for such acts of rape against women. This was the background voice while the video showed three men trying to rape two women of which one escapes and the other is unfortunately raped.

I wondered what would happen if by any chance I woke up in Delhi someday. Would I step out of the house? Would I stay inside and keep checking if the doors are bolted properly? Would I think twice before wearing a particular dress? Would I walk out of the house praying that I should get back home safe? Would I be walking in a street with thousands of male eyes wanting to feast on me?  Would I think hundred times before working late since I will have to get back home before it turns dark? Would I be living scared all the time? Would by heart be thumping each time I was alone? Would I always need a companion or bodyguard for my safety?

The "Would I" questions suddenly stopped haunting me as I realised that this was just my fearful mind playing tricks. I was not in Delhi. I heaved a sigh of relief.

There was one more question that frightened me, "What if someday my city became like Delhi? Who am I to blame then?"

The spark in every relationship

Over a cup of coffee with a friend yesterday, we began speaking about "The Spark" that exists in a relationship. Many people believe that there is no such thing called spark that exists and after a few years in a relationship, it all dies down. Infact after a few years what remains is just a compromise.

But I say, let your relationship not be based on compromises. That's the worst string that can attach the two of you in a relationship. My friend spoke of his other friend who had always dreamt of marrying a girl who was smart and shared the same ideologies.

But owing to parental pressure and discontent over his obesity, he found himself married to a woman older to him and completely different from him. His parents are happy, his wife loves him, she's affectionate but he's still not found the SPARK in his relationship.

A Spark can be anything. It differs from person to person. It can be physical appearance, the crazy behaviour of your partner, the way she smiles, the way he/she makes you feel, the way he/she looks at you etc.

I remember a friend who was trying hard to find the perfect match. He and his parents were having a tough time trying to find a girl for him in their tribe. After a tiresome search, he finally said a yes to a girl and they were engaged instantly. But he kept telling us that he wasn't attracted to her. Everytime they spoke over the phone, they didnt have much to talk about. Neither of them were interested in knowing about each other. I knew by then that they weren't meant for each other. I tried to ask my friend what is it that he liked in her. He was finding it difficult to even mention one quality about her that fascinated him. The engagement broke off within the next ten days. Thankfully a few months later he met another girl whom he really liked and they are happily married now.

When I met my husband for the first time, within a few minutes it clicked. I had found my Spark that remains alive even today.

A Spark is something that grows over time in your relationship. If it begins to diminish then you either need to bring it alive in your relationship or it was something that never existed. You do not have to be explicit about it, it can be something that needs to be felt only by the two of you. It is something that you need to cherish and make it grow inside you. It is something that will bind you together in a strong chord.

What is the Spark in your relationship? Have you found it yet? It can occur at anytime. Sometimes it may take years for you to find it. The sooner or later, don't ever miss to "Sparkle you life with that beautiful Spark"

The Downtown Flea - Come untangle yourself !!

The month of December is known to gather tourists from around the world to the blissful state of Goa. It attracted me too and I planned to travel to Goa early in the month of December, 2014. I was advised not to leave Goa without visiting the "Flea Market" in Arpora. They even said that let yourself loose to enjoy the spirit of Goa. Following the tradition suggested by my friends and also some online well-wishers who had left positive reviews about the "Flea Market", I paid a visit to this market and it was one of the best decisions that I had taken during my entire travel.  There was music, dance, food, apparel, accessories, live band and a lot more to name all at a single place. How I wished to experience something similar in Pune or Mumbai where I could visit on and often and I didn't have to perpetually plan for a travel?

Much to my surprise, within a few days I saw a fan page in Facebook about a Flea Market happening in Pune. 

Yes, if you live in Pune or somewhere close to it then do not lose a chance to experience this one of a kind Market.

The "Down Town Flea" is being held at "The Irish Village" (Nr Hard Rock Cafe & Raga Lawns) - Koregaon Park on the 17th and 18th of January, 2015. Just two days to go !!!

Ever visited a place where there is art coupled with culture, music coupled with eccentricity, good food coupled with a cup of coffee? If not then this is one place that you just cannot miss. 

This bizarre bazaar has a lot to offer with varieties which I am afraid you will lose count of. Imagine yourself, sipping a cup of coffee, tasting some yummy waffles and a live band performs right in front of you. That would be a treat to all your senses, won't it? You can find "Peher" an all girls band, The Folk Pop beauty "Che", "Strota" famous for their Vedic Rock and Indie Music, contemporary artists "AWD" , the maestro "Krishna Marathe" and a lot more.



If you wish to take a break from music, you do not have to leave the Flea, just look around you lovely ladies, the shops are going to surely make you empty your wallets. From handmade household decor to accessories and fashion footwear to trendy clothes, I am sure you will need to carry a lot of bags home. 

       

That's not it. There are some workshops that are going to be held at the market. For all your creative buffs, this is for you. Tickle your creative senses and let your creativity flow at Pune's very first Flea. 



The fun and eccentricity does not end here, the after-party sponsor, "Blue Frog" allows you to enter for free on 17th Jan with just a stamp that you need to collect at the "Down Town Flea".

I can't wait to witness this amazing event happening at one of the most youth-filled vibrant city of Pune. 

Block your calendars and cancel every appointment to untangle yourself from your monotonous life at "The Down Town Flea". 

Follow them at The Downtown Flea